in case you are wondering… no, this post is not about being arrested and being tried in a court of law. to my knowledge, i think i pretty much fall into the category of law-abiding citizen.
this post has to do with a completely different type of trial.
a trial that every pregnant woman should be allowed to have– a trial of labor.
for those of you who aren’t pregnant and haven’t done 4,592 hours of research about pregnancy and delivery, let me define for you what a “trial of labor” is. it is “allowing a woman to be in labor long enough to determine if a vaginal birth may be anticipated.”
(i never thought i’d actually use the term “vaginal” in a blog post. whatdoyaknow….)
i am going to tell you something:
i never, ever, ever imagined that a relatively healthy first time mother would have to fight so hard for the right to naturally have a healthy baby.
but, unfortunately, that’s the fight i’m currently waging.
truth be told, b&my baby is measuring ahead of schedule for her fetal growth… and because of that, we are basically being told to schedule her birth via cesarean.
there are a lot more details that i’m not going to go into here, simply because this post would be longer than some articles in the encyclopedia britanica, and i don’t want to bore you with facts, statistics, and other information that i’ve collected in researching for a birth that i thought was a given for all women unless they faced an emergency.
(however, if you would like information on macrosomia, shoulder dystocia, the accuracy [or inaccuracy] of ultrasounds, the reasons [and non-reasons] for cesarean sections, etc., i’d be happy to point you to several studies that i’ve read…)
some of you might be thinking, “why don’t you just change providers?” trust me, i wish it was that easy. i am getting a second opinion this week, just to see what another OB outside of my practice is thinking… and if he’s more open to a natural birth. if so, i might just change. but here’s the thing: insurance TRAPS you. the way they bundle fees makes it almost impossible to change providers without having to personally pay out thousands (literally thousands) of dollars. and whereas i believe the birth of my child is worth that money hands-down, it’s a hard decision to make when you don’t necessarily have those $1000s lying in a bank account somewhere. (if you read some of my other posts recently, you kinda know where my husband and i are in our financial lives.)
so, why am i writing this post?
i know that lots of my friends and family read this, and to them (and anyone else who cares to) i ask to pray. pray that God will give my husband and me wisdom as to know what to do– and give us a peace about the birth choices surrounding this child. (of course, it’s very tempting for me to ask for a miraculous change in the hearts of the doctors and what not, and you can pray for that too… but i recognize that peace comes from God in us, not necessarily a change in circumstances.)
of course, please pray for a healthy baby girl…
but besides asking for prayer, i’m writing this as a little word of warning. for those of you who are expecting, or find yourself expecting soon– please, please, please do you research on health care providers. i was naive and assumed that, of course!, all doctors would be pro-vaginal (i said it again!) birth and not be extremely quick and extremely aggressive about cesarean sections, but that *is not the case.* i keep thinking to myself that if i had chosen better at the beginning that i wouldn’t be facing this huge stress now… but hindsight is 20/20… and you better believe that next time around will be a different story.
unfortunately, though, if i am forced to have a c-section, i even more drastically reduce my chances of ever being allowed to birth a baby with my body or being given the privilege of having my trial of labor. and i cannot begin to tell you how sad that makes me.
i believe every woman has the right to try to have her baby in the way she believes is best for her, her child, and her family.
please pray for me as i fight for that right.