Remnants of 5

“she’s getting so big!” the lady says, putting a bulletin in my empty hand while looking at my daughter, who is holding the other. “i know!” i reply, inwardly bracing for the inevitable facing of follow-up comments and “demands.” a command to have… “number 2…!” she exclaims. “it’s time for number 2!” she sing-songs, her voice ...

endless grace

it’s been a couple of months ago now when a dear, dear man to me went home to be with his Jesus. i used to try and be brave at funerals, but i didn’t even bother at his.  i let my grief fall freely down my face, as my heart ached at my loss– at ...

why i write

several weeks ago, a friend challenged me to take a few moments to spell out and blog why it is i write.  i found the timing a bit ironic, considering that at that moment, i was taking a hiatus from writing.  oh, not because i wanted to.  i never really do… it was because beginning ...

balloons on your chair.

july 15th was my cousin’s birthday.  it was his first in heaven; it was our first without him. ____ it was your birthday… and i cried for you. seeing balloons dance in the wind around grief.. around graves… i cried for you. everyone had left by then. i was late to the party they had; ...

remembering my Gone-to-Soon.

i remember you today… my tiny one, my Gone-to-Soon, my little Sparrow. i remember you today… when i’m told “Happy Mother’s Day!” as people see me with your sister. i hold her hand in my right; my other hand Empty. my heart holding you. i remember you today… and that Moment when i first knew ...